Despair

Hello,
Only just fighting for survival here, sorry if I'm muddled After 3 assessments in 12 months I am no longer functioning. I had PIP for mental health last Sept, decision December: it has caused me lasting harm. Paper review, full award indefinite period.Then GP off long term sick June which has caused me deep distress (nightmares etc). No locum. Receptionists not even answering phone. Many errors prescribing meds.
Actively suicidal to receive yet another ESA50 form end of June. Age UK lady contacted DWP
who said that given my file marked vulnerable & requiring additional support plus recent phone call to GP (Oct/Nov 2016)," I didn't have to fill in the form & they will make a decision on ESA on the evidence they already have". Returned form with covering letter from her & sent off evidence of substantial risk, Gp letter saying unfit to travel or cope with F2F 9 months old & Gp's very detailed PIP letter 9 months old: clear evidence of risk, unable to cope with social engagement, inappropriate behaviour with others.
I didn't know this might lead to an is it E113? sent to surgery to be filled in by stretched GP who doesn't know me (1 is very hostile to me through no fault of my own).Thought I'd put off suicide until a decision letter arrived & try to make the most of the time I had left. However I've been increasingly distressed & unstable since. Extreme stress & terror.
Today letter from Maximus for F2F appointment more than 90 mins travel away. Assume they haven't bothered to read letters. Age uk lady on holiday.
Have I any options left or is it the final solution? I do have a GP appt next week which I'm already terrified about attending.

Maximus denies having received the letters, despite me sending them by recorded delivery : I have the details & time of who signed for them. DWP has now backtracked & have said a decision about needing a F2F hasn't been made. In July they said they had enough information to make a decision!! B*****!!s My life is literally hanging in the balance here.
Letter from GP has been sent again, completely unable to travel, life at risk F2F, not kidding.
I keep saying to Age UK your advice about asking "what further medical evidence do you need to do a paper based review" but they won't listen. I'd like them to help me fill in another ESA50 (which DWP originally said I didn't have to do). Maximus hasn't even contacted GP. I don't think Age Uk want to do this as there are long waiting lists & I'm so distressed. Is it worth me
downloading ESA form (if I can work out how to do it ) &sending this in as further info at this stage, theres a police referral as vulnerable adult too/Victim Support? Or is it too late?
Or should I write to MP? Times running out, if they send another appointment I'll only have days left to do anything? Many thanks.

P.S There's some good new stuff on MIND website about coping with these terrible thoughts, distraction, a 60sec meditation, thought shrinkers.

Thanks for caring about me Gordon:) However much a struggle it would have been in July, I do believe it would have been better to have help to fill in the ESA form then.
I've had an emergency GP appt at home today, more meds. GP may be able to phone DWP. I'm too ill to go out or do anything. I'm so angry that they can still kill people like this: no safeguards. At least PIP is meant to identify vulnerables first.
I'll see if I can draft a letter to MP tonight.