Sick of all the assessments, constant worry and...

Hi Paul,
I'm sorry to hear that things are so difficult at home.
I have just answered a post from a lady called Judy who had a similar query. She told us that she was 'downgraded' for being a carer to her autistic daughter. This does seem to show that it is very likely that DWP will use being a carer as a reason not to award PIP. (Frankly DWP will use any excuse!)
There is nothing legally yo prevent someone getting PIP and carer's allowance, but you need to be able to prove you can give 35 hours of care (including supervision, reassurance, watchful eye, prompting as well as physical help,) even though you yourself have disabilities. It's a hurdle, but not an insurmountable one.
I appreciate that your potential claim for Carer’s Allowance may be driven through a need to increase finances, however, maybe there are other options you could explore?
As presumably your daughter has DLA or PIP then someone else could look after your daughter fir 35hrs a week, and they could claim Carer’s Allowance. This could provide valuable income for a person on low income.
As your daughter is severely disabled, she might be eligible for a care package from the local council. If you contact your council they would arrange an assessment, usually done by an OT, and if your daughter was eligible for care then she would be allocated the appropriate number of hours, which could be used to provide carer/s. (I'm not sure whether this might be able to be used to top up someone claiming Carer’s Allowance.) In addition, if there were any suitable disability gadgets the OT could recommend these and you may be eligible to get these free, or get money towards their cost.
I hope this helps.
Good luck.
LL26

Hello Paul,

I am really sorry to hear about how you are feeling - but please fight on. Even if you don’t feel important at the moment, remember how pivotal you are to your wife and daughter. Nobody else can give them the emotional support which you offer them. Rather than burying your head you should stand proud for being the loving husband and father you are.

I suspect that your question about why the DWP does not use your PIP form to assess your capability for work is a rhetorical one, but the answer is that PIP looks the difficulties you have with everyday life and moving around, however the Capability for Work assessment looks at the difficulties you may have in a work environment. For some people there is little difference, but for others there is a big difference.

We do have a guide for Capability forms which you may find useful. UC & ESA resources

Given how the whole process is making your feel, combined with the mental health issues you describe I wonder if you would wish to consider making your wife your appointee. This means that she would become responsible for claiming your benefits and would be able to represent you at an assessment. I wrote quite a long post a while ago about this which you might like to read.

www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/forum1/10-dla-...on-being-a-appointee

If that is not the right route for you, you might wish to consider asking your GP to write a letter saying that you are unable to attend a face to face or telephone assessment since they would cause you overwhelming psychological distress and requesting that you are given a paper assessment. The DWP do not always comply with such requests, but you might think it is worth a try.

Please remember that we are here for you through this process.
Catherine