Medical- mental health

I wanted to share the distress this has caused me and how different it was from the last time a few years ago when it was a home visit. Then I was listened to, there was no computer, everything I said was written down carefully, in contrast today it was very different. Not so much questions, as statements, You answer the door don't you?- (trying to remember whie fresh in mind)How aften do you see your friends (when say I didn't hardly ever) come on what can I tell my computer! When said didn't see the GP as much as had moved surgery 'so it's just more inconvenient then?' (also said this about othe things such as support with taking child to school (so for convenience then?) When said I could take all day trying to clear up something 'so why is that then' it was horrible and I felt and still feel awful, yes I know things are not easy and I've been suffering with PND and try to be easy on myself but just made me feel so inadequate and pathetic, seemed to lack understanding of depression. Also it seemed to miss out the main thing which is a huge problem which is sleep problems, she just asked when I go to sleep and i said it was all mixed up, I often do very early then am up later for hours and she got quite exasperated 'I'll put 8pm' that was that..`i had heard these were horrible but didn't realise like that. Don't think could do that again, is all as my GP has left and I have very little support at the moment

Hi Sarah, I am so sorry that your medical assesment caused you so much stress and unhappiness and I know exactly how you feel, it sounds very similar to my experience.

My medical assesment was with a female nurse and she was not at all interested in me or my problems; as you say, they just want to tick boxes on the computer. The nurse sighed heavily and did not make eye contact when I spoke 'out of turn' so I didn't do it again!

I have been told by this forum that this is just normal procedure so try not to take the experience personaly, (easier said than done), but really, it is not a reflection on you.

I seemed to have made the biggest mistake filling out my ESA50 ? form and because of that am still looking for an agency to support me. I think you mentioned Mind in a previous message. Could you go back to them for support?

I wish you all the best and feel free to chat to me anytime. PND is terrible and needs to be treated seriously.

Rachel x

Hello Sarah,

I've only had one medical so far and it was not too bad but it still felt like the Spanish Inquisition and it took me a long time to get over it.

I do understand how you fell about your doctor though. Mine is lovely but it takes an age to get to see her and, since I no longer need sick notes, I feel I don't want to waste her time! I'm on the waiting list for cognitive behavioural therapy (5 months now) and feel as though I'm completely in limbo. My depression's been very bad lately - in bed and sleeping most of the time - but can't see the point of going to doctor for a 5min nodding session!

I'm also worried that NOT seeing the dr regularly will go against me as they asked me how often I see her at my ATOS medical!

Sorry not to be much constructive help to you - but keep going, and IF the medical goes against you keep fighting. The aim of the game now seems to be to destroy us bit by bit as we're the new hate targets for the government and others who just don't understand.

Remember that you do have value and your life does have meaning - you DO matter.

Teresa.

Hi- thanks for your replies. It was just so different to the last one 5 years ago, I was shocked. She also seemed to get quite muddled but I was just too upset at the time and scared to interrupt her. For example, she said i hadn't worked for 3 years, and it's 5, also she did things like give statements rather than questions, especially as time went on, eg, looked at my form and then said 'so you're teetotal?' I think I nodded but have no memory of talking about drinking! (I don't have a drink problem so guess this shouldn't matter) but it was the manner.

Sorry was still churning it all through there, have calmed down a bit now. Rachel, Teresa, thank you, it makes me feel a bit better to know it is not just me. Am getting cross and exhausted with myself for having it all churning about in my head IYKWIM (e.g- going over that time she lloked at me and said a bit despairingly that I needed to think of things I can do...) Anyway am trying hard to put it too the back of my mind and stop going over it. Teresa, I am similar with the GP. Mine who had been at the practice since 1999 left a couple of years ago to start a family (and they wouldn't let her stay part time which also irks me) and the other is even the health visitor admits, terrifying (but apparently very good for not-mental health issues (eg she's so fierce she'll get you into the hospital no prob) Anyway I can't see her, so I'll have to change GP I guess, the health visitor is great and has done CBT course with me before, I just feel guilty as I know how she is busy with new mothers who need more support than me! Take care both of you

Hi- Just thought I'd post and say that I found out I 'passed' the medical, for another 6 months at least. The assessor did say it would be a good idea to change my doctor to one who specialised in mental health issues and then I shouldn't have to go through it again in the future, so I suppose that is helpful of her.